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( You are about to view content that may only be appropriate for adults. )

https://www.youtube.com/user/777ROTI

A live performance over a self produced backing track,,,,,

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Я вышел на набережную, Волга была спокойна, небольшие волны набегали на песок пляжа. Солнце находилось на той стороне и двигалось к горам, было тепло и сухо, обычный в Самаре вечер. Я сел на лавочку закинул ногу на ногу и стал слушать воробья, который сидел на ветке и с кем-то разговаривал. На другом конце лавки сидели две женщины и тоже беседовали между собой. Их разговор почему-то сразу привлек меня, и я перестал слушать воробья и незаметно прислушался к разговору женщин. П о существу говорила только одна женщина , она рассказывала о том, что к ней из деревни приехала молодая племянница. Она учительница в школе и была вызвана из района на курсы при педагогическом институте для учебы. А у нее в квартире живет ее сын со снохой и старик ее. Вот приезжает племянница и просит, погостится на время учебы. «Ну, я пускаю, хотя жить можно только на диване в коридоре. В это время у снохи заболевает мать, и она срочно уезжает к матери в Кинель. Я смотрю, после отъезда снохи, сын с племянницей не расстаются. Куда он и она тоже с ним, то в кино, то погулять. А девка-то видная! Я с ней в бане была, так всю ее и разглядела: сзади пониже спины изгиб и выпуклость, соски налитые, вот-вот лопнут, щеки и шея – кровь с молоком, а губы большие, как у лошади. Ну, ходят они и ходят, может так и надо. Только вот приезжает сноха через неделю, у него все с ней в порядке, живут еще дружней. А племянница выглядит бледно, ходит грустная и все на сына моего глядит. Вот теперь думаю: как ее поскорей домой отправить, хорошо, если она чистая, а вдруг забеременела и с икрой? Надо ее тоже к мужу в деревню уговорить уехать. Как ты думаешь?» Я не стал больше слушать бабью болтовню и пошел по берегу, наслаждаясь последними блесками солнца на воде. У меня есть женщина, тихая, душа добрая и тело ничего, еще твердое. Живем пока без брака. Но чувствую, когда приезжаем к родне в гости, ей становиться неудобно, представлять меня как друга. Разговор двух женщин вернул меня к моей жизни и надо бы решить эту проблему. Вот только сделать это надо с умом. Женщины натуры чувствительные, им без чувств никак нельзя. Счастье для женщины это любовь и семья по любви. Надо предложить ей зарегистрироваться в Загсе. Завтра схожу в магазин на Ленинградской и куплю ей чернобурку на воротник, пусть порадуется, а потом приглашу расписаться.

Once when I was a little bitty kid
I wanted to be super popular
I wanted to have what the others had
And do what they did

I’m surprised that I lasted so long
It took me a fortnight to realize
That being myself made me happiest
And it made me strong

This is who I want to be
They may not like what they see
But I feel free

And I don’t care about what they say
I don’t really give a damn about them anyway
If you think that the way I feel doesn’t matter
Then you don’t matter to me

Sometimes I act a little uncouth
And I can be straight up obnoxious
I say things that aren’t what you want to hear
But it’s always the truth

Maybe I am a little obscene
And my words can hurt like razor blades
But tact has never been my strongest suit
I never mean to be mean

If you don’t like what I say
If you don’t think it’s ok
Then walk away

And I won’t care about what you say
I won’t really give a damn about you anyway
If you think that the way I think doesn’t matter
Then you don’t matter to me

These norms just seem so petty
They box me in and I wanna break out
They get so over-bearing
They keep me down and I wanna freak out

These people try to herd me
They box me in and I wanna break out
I don’t need their instructions
They keep me down and I wanna freak out

Can’t fix me, I’m not broken
Don’t box me in ‘cause I’m gonna break out
Can’t tweak me, I am flawless
Don’t bring me down or I’m gonna freak out

They don’t know all that I do
They don’t know what I’ve been through
They have no clue

So I don’t care about what they say
I don’t really give a damn about them anyway
If you think that what I believe doesn’t matter
Then you don’t matter to me

And I don’t care about what they do
I don’t really give a damn, and you know it’s true
I have people who think and feel that I matter
And that’s what matters to me

If I don’t matter to you
Then you don’t matter to me
If I don’t matter to you
Then you don’t matter to me

Discover the romantic and suspenseful world of DANGEROUS via this newly released book trailer - and (coincidence?) the eBook in on sale for just 99¢ Sept. 7-13 at Amazon!

My first post! How fitting its a Headhunterz song. Ready for the growth!

Five years of pursuing my bachelor's degree in music performance is finally coming to a close. Throughout all of the people I've met, the circumstances that inspired me, and the insanely great opportunities I was given and gladly took during that period of time, it all feels like it has been more like ten years. My first classes as a freshman in my first university feel so far away from me that they are, in some sort of mental sense, out of my reach.
And now, after five years of hard work, I am finally taking my last two classes to fill in my general requirements for graduation. Should I complain? No. I am not even sure I really want to complain. Not unlike any college senior, I am going through a syndrome that, although is not prescribed, it is definitely real. This term my friends, my professors, and my parents have so carefully coined as 'senioritis' hit me hard and fast during the last month or so of this past spring semester. I feel like I have been mentally tapping my toes, drumming my fingers, and sighing nearly every day.
So why don't I feel that irritability now? Is it because I have officially realized that my undergraduate career is really, truly almost over? Or is it just all of the pretty summer trees and the dreaded pollen allergies making my head spin?
I really can't tell you which. In this case, it's most likely to be a combination of both. Stony Brook U's main campus has genuinely beautiful trees of all sorts, including apple and cherry trees. And so, being how I am, I can't help but stop everything I'm doing and take a picture of a particular tree or flower, or even smell and examine the plant.
Yet, I don't really remember doing so and checking all out the details of the school during they years that I was there. It seems as if my leaving the place where I had learned how to be a good musician and human being and where I had made a second home ( often literally using my practice as a bedroom to stay the night in, from time to time ) has something to do with this.
There's a certain surrealism when you leave a place, as if it's already behind you, or as if it's merely a vivid part of your memory now and no more. Even while you're sitting in the classrooms, the recital hall, the areas of lots of grass and beautiful trees with white blossoms. It is no longer actually there in your life anymore. It almost feels like a dream.
And now, after all this time of daydreaming and planning what I'll do when I finish my undergraduate career,leaving it all behind just feels so suddenly odd.
Well, now comes the serious job hunting, the grad school auditioning, and finally getting my driver's license. I can't deny the excitement and nervousness I feel about my life that is about to be, but no matter how hard I try, trying to un-glue myself from a university that in all sincerity has cultivated both me and my art is strangely challenging.

Hello. I've joined LJ again after a long time away. I came back because I wanted a place to share my art with other people and to get more feedback on it. So below is an example of my art.

http://shadymoonjasmine.deviantart.com/art/The-Flower-429388268

Hey
So, I'm going through a bit of a I'm-almost-18-what-am-I-doing-with-my-life crisis right now.
For the past year and a half or so, I had decided that in college I was going to double major as music composition and theater, but when I recently found out that those two cannot be a double major together, I picked music composition. I have been playing piano since I was 5 and I always wrote silly songs, but I've only really performed an original song once.
Now, I am getting ready to audition to colleges. I have to learn three new songs, and I have found the whole process annoying. It has been hell trying to get myself to practice piano at all, and when I do I find myself detested. I have recently been struggling with serious depression and anxiety problems, so I thought that might be the cause and once I got on medication everything would be fine. Well, I'm going on my third week on meds and I feel great, yet I still don't want to play.
My biggest dream of all has been to be a film actor, so before I figured composition would be my fall back, but now I don't know. So what do you guys think?
Does this seem like my composition really isn't what I want to do? Or is this just an emotional fluke and I need to get my head in the game?

What is Art in my mind?
Art is the way to knowledge of the unknown.
Art must search the new way of development but contemporary art has chosen a false way - the way of the black art.
It is the road to nowhere.
we made the Art a servant of the consumer but Art is not a design and an artist is not a designer.
If I did not know about the new perfection in Art I would not talk about it.
The artist Valentin Massov created the new direction in Art - Spiritual Realism.
His water color works radiate light. 
Unfortunately I can not exhibit Valentin Massov's works which he has made in the period 1975 - 1979,
because my camera can not make them.
I can only tell about him.

I am 40. It's my Point of no Return. It's a maturity on my calendar.
I am a mature person with my outlook and concept of life.
I am free from unnecessary illusions and another's opinions. I know that I want, and I know that I do not want.
I have a choice and it mine.
I know value of creativity. I have possibility to work how I understand it and I feel it, without looking back at
tendencies art-business.
I do not catch mirages because I know my way.
I do not owe anything to anybody and it makes me free.
I still want and can think. I do not know what is depression, because I have faith in God.
I am glad that I can repeat my words which I told 17 years back: "He has surrendered, because he have had no belief," though now I wouldn't began to condemn him, because I know this ruthless world of evil.
My talent is my diamond of the first water which can't be taken away and which gives me dividends more than money all world.
My future is in God hands, therefore I am quiet...
http://olga-romanova.blogspot.com/

I'd just like to share two animated music videos with you...

This one is for the Particle Zoo song, 'Even an Army'.


And this one is for, 'Popinjay' by The Joy Formidable.

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Hello!
My name is Olga. I am an artist from Russia. One year ago I started to study English. I am sure that study language need in process of people-to-people contact. And I decided to write a book in English about my life. I know my English is poor but I believe I can learn English very well by this way. So, I am sorry for my English.

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Magick Brother (1996) - INTERVIEW

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The veterans of Russian industrial-psychedelic rock. The first band to play dark wave music in Russia.
WATCH AND LISTEN THE LAUGHING OF YOUR TOYS!
WATCH THE VIDEO - http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yU2kpVIMJUg

You can also read the story about writing the song and ask Yuri Zvezdniy on his official LJ page
Official page of this video
Download the new retrospective album
Last FM --->
Official site of the band--->
Official Myspace page--->

HARDDIVE