Story Mode:Float Parade Pigs

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Biography

Hero in Residence

Above and Beyond

Interactions

Hero in Residence

Reuben memorial

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Jesse: Best pig that ever lived. Miss ya buddy.

Radar: Aw man... I wish I could’ve met Reuben. He sounded amazing. I read Lukas’s book the other day. That chapter about Reuben almost got me crying right there...

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 He saved us all.

Jesse: He was a hero. Saved everybody. He’d be really excited about how great Beacontown is now.

Radar: I bet that’s totally true.

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 He was my best friend.

Jesse: Yeah... He was my best friend. Still miss him.

Radar: Aw...

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 He would’ve liked you.

Jesse: I think he would’ve liked you.

Radar: Yeah?

Jesse: Oh yeah. I bet you would’ve totally been friends.

Radar: Wow...

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 ...

(Saddened, Jesse remains silent.)

Radar: Sorry.

(The float coordinator approaches the pair.)

Citizen: Ohmigosh it’s you.

Jesse: Oh, yep, it’s me. What are you doing here?

Citizen: Oh wow this is actually perfect. For Founding Day this year we’re picking a pig to play the part of Reuben on the float!

Radar: Oh, that’s really cute.

Citizen: Right? Would you be interested in... maybe helping me pick? I mean, who knows Reuben better than Jesse, right?

Radar: Yeah talk about knowledgeable casting.

Citizen: It would be an honor to say that the pig was hand-chosen by Jesse for the part.

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 I can do that.

Jesse: I would love to! Seems like the least I could do.

Citizen: Oh that’s fantastic! Thank you so much.

Jesse: Alright let’s see ‘em!

Citizen: Okay piggies, show Jesse your good side! That’s Esteban... Smushy Cutecheeks... and Lord von Thunderpork VI. Tried my best to bring the pigs that felt the most... Reuben-esque. Hm?

Radar: They’re all adorable.

Citizen: Raised all of ‘em myself.

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 They’re all the same.

Jesse: But they all look exactly the same?

Citizen: What? No they-- I am offended! They are, I’m pretty sure, offended! Look at their offended little faces!

Jesse: Sorry. I just can’t pick one.

Citizen: Fine. Well in that case I guess there just won’t be a Reuben in the festival this year. C’mon boys.

(End of interaction.)

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 Esteban

Jesse: Definitely Esteban. He’s got the most intelligent face.

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 Smushy Cutecheeks

Jesse: I’m a Smushy Cutecheeks fan. He’s just got that vibe.

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 Lord von Thunderpork VI

Jesse: My vote is for Lord von Thunderpork VI. No question. Look at the regal little guy.

Radar: Really?

Citizen: Ah! I knew that’s who you’d choose - Fantastic! Congratulations!! Thank you Jesse. I’m going to go get him ready and I’ll see you at the celebration!

Radar: Bye!

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 Sorry, no time.

Jesse: Sorry, I just really don’t have a lot of time..

Radar: It’s true. Very busy schedule today.

Citizen: Okay, okay that’s fine. I understand. I’ll see you around!

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 ...

(Jesse stays silent, making the citizen worry he has offended them.)

Citizen: I... I didn’t mean any offense? I’m sorry?

Radar: Ooookay let’s get going then?

Above and Beyond

Pork chop stand

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Citizen: I did it, Jesse. I did what you asked. Now there are porkchops... for everyone...

(A golem begins walking towards the citizen.)

Citizen: Would you like to taste one? I made ‘em myself. They’re... fresh... I promise!

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 I will eat a porkchop!

Jesse: You know what? I will have a porkchop.

(The golem steps away.)

Citizen: You... would you like... Esteban... or Smushy Cutecheeks... or Lord von Thunderpork VI? They’re all good... Were good... They were so good...

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 Esteban

Jesse: I think Esteban sounds... good.

Citizen: Right... away...

(Jesse eats Esteban's porkchop.)

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You ate the porkchop. Wow.

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 Smushy Cutecheeks

Jesse: Smushy Cutecheeks always was a favorite.

Citizen: Right... away...

(Jesse eats Smushy Cutecheeks' porkchop.)

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You ate the porkchop. Wow.

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 Lord von Thunderpork VI

Jesse: Gotta go with the royal porkchop. Lord von Thunderpork VI, please.

Citizen: Right... away...

(Jesse eats Lord von Thunderpork VI's porkchop.)

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You ate the porkchop. Wow.

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 ...

Citizen: You... changed your mind? You don’t want one?

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 Uh... no thank you.

Jesse: No... no thank you. And you know what? You could... change to carrots, if you wanted...

Citizen: I’ll do that, thank you, Jesse... Maybe... maybe I’ll get some new pigs? I’ll name them Dennis... and Countess Pink Paisley IV...

Jesse: Hope that didn’t get this guy in trouble...

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 How could you?!?

Jesse: No! How could you-- no. No more porkchops. No more.

Citizen: But you--but it-- I was... Okay. I’m so sorry...

Jesse: Hope that didn’t get this guy in trouble...

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 ...

(Jesse stays silent, worrying the citizen.)

Citizen: They’re not cooked the way you like, are they? I’m so sorry! I’ll do better next time! Please don’t send me away.

(The golem zaps away the citizen.)

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